To My Girls with Love, A Mother's Oath
By: Sienna Hunter-Cuyjet, LMSW, LCSW, LICSW, ACSW
I had spent some time crafting my thoughts and experiences about being a working mom, sharing funny moments that other parents would read, relate and have a moment of deep laughter. However there have been some life plot twists and I find myself looking at my two girls worried about what the world holds for them. I mean I always worry, what parent doesn’t? This though..this a new worry, one that has left me feeling pained, anxious and angry.
So I share with you a letter to my Daughters that I wrote during some odd hour of the morning yet another sleepless night filled with streams of thoughts trying to find a space to hold them…
My sweet girls…I wish I could say the world wasn’t a fucked up place to exist in right now. I hoped that just maybe we are leaving it to you in a better place than what we had received it in but here we are, the adults have gotten wrapped up in individualistic capitalism, consumed with greed and the need to be right all the time. The adults have forgotten their vows, commitments, and promises to the future generations. My anger is strong but not consuming. My anger motivates me to act, speak louder, shine brighter.
Ugh I wish we could create our own safe space. Eating sweets until our bellies ache, being kissed on our noses by butterflies, riding unicorns and sliding down rainbows.
Despite all the chaos I still seem to have found this moment to stand in the center of the storm and feel calm and peace. Go ahead world storm! Let the heavy rains pour down, so it can wash away the ugliness and the water can give life to the planted seeds of change.
Did you know you two are those planted seeds of change?
I say to you my girls…
Stand TALL, Stand STRONG, Stand BRAVE
Be unmoved
Be unafraid
Be Bold
Be Brilliant
Be Boss
Embrace your identities. Love your body with your sun kissed color, it is forever and always yours. Honor your full self. Dance to your hearts’ content.
Lead with light & love, unwavering in your convictions. Have purpose, be purpose and give purpose.
Shine, Sass up!
Know you are never alone in this journey although it will feel lonely at times. You stand together, I stand with you, your aunties stand with you, your grandmas stand with you. Remember the generations of grandmas, aunties, mommas, sisters and cousins who came before us dancing these same paths. Their footprints soften the earth for us.
You come from warrior women who not only broke the rules but rewrote them. They defied gravity, time and space. The word “no” did not break them like many had hoped but instead it empowered them, fueled them, strengthened them to do more and be more.
My anger is strong but not consuming. My anger motivates me to act, speak louder, shine brighter.
As your momma, as your fierce protector and fountain of love.
I Stand TALL, I Stand STRONG, I Stand BRAVE with you.
I will be unmoved with you.
I will be unafraid with you.
I will be Bold with you.
I will be Brilliant with you.
I will be Boss with you.
I will embrace my identities. I will love my body. I will honor my full self. We will always dance with each other.
I will Lead with light & love, unwavering in my convictions. I will have purpose, be purpose and give purpose.
With you both I Shine, I Sass up!
And I guess if all else fails you can always resort to one of my favorites: Say fuck you with a smile, bid them a nice day and keep it moving. They will be left standing there speechless, you an unforgettable memory stored in their brain.
Love,
Momma
About:
Sienna Hunter-Cuyjet, LMSW, LCSW, LICSW, ACSW (she/her) is the Clinical & Community Engagement Manager & a Psychotherapist at And Still We Rise, LLC, and a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker. Learn more about Sienna here.